I've been on a Project Spaciousness kick for a long time, now, and I'm finally discovering that it doesn't just pertain to my possessions... I'm trying to make space in my life, too. I also believe that God has a way of making room for His plans whether or not we're on board. Right now, I feel him clearing my social calendar.
I feel like I've lost many friends over the past 12 months. Most have not been by choice -- instead just situations where the other person had chosen to leave the relationship. Man, that is painful. I lost my first best friend in a long, long time -- she has chosen a different path and it does not include me. I still ache over that. She's my baby's godmother, and there is a space for her in my heart that has not healed over yet.
I lost my book group. Most of the women weren't really close friends -- more like friendly acquaintances -- but I really enjoyed them and will miss their presence.
I lost my favorite scrapbook store, and with it the frequent hanging-out sessions with one of my favorite people, Terri. She has five kids, so even though she's not running the store any more, she doesn't really have "free time" to get together. (We did finally manage to get together for a Starbucks visit -- our first in 6 months! -- the other day. I hope we'll have more of those!).
And so on... It's quite lonely. But I have faith that God will fill the holes. I am excited to see who will come into my life... but I find it difficult to "make new friends." I feel too old for this! It brings up all my insecurities and fears and "am I good enough???" feelings.
Tell me about your friends. Are they friends of convenience or friends of the heart? Where did you find them? Have you ever lost a friend? What happened and how did you recover?